Ellen on being a loser

“Start thinking positively. You will notice a difference. Instead of 'I think I'm a loser,' try 'I definitely am a loser.' Stop being wishy-washy about things! How much more of a loser can you be if you don't even know you are one? Either you are a loser or you are not. Which is it, stupid?” 

― Ellen DeGeneres, The Funny Thing Is...

Stupidity quotes part II

Be yourself is the worst advice you could give to some people

 I'd slap you in the face, but that would be animal abuse. 

It isn't that I'm not a people person, I'm just not a stupid people person.

You really can't fix stupid. You sure as hell can laugh at it, though. 

I'm sorry that your stupid

I'm sorry, I don't speak the language of Stupidity. Kindly flock back to your kind


Someday you'll go far, and I hope you'll stay there. 

 I love the sound you make when you shut-up

Quotes About Playing dumb

“The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they’re going to be when you kill them”

—	Troian Bellisario

No Limit to stupidity quotes

If stupid could fly, you'd be a jet.

Congratulations on weighing yourself down with the dumbest anchor you could find Don't underestimate the power of stupid people in large numbers I thought you were a sane, rational person capable of intelligent conversation. Clearly, I was misinformed.

A friend in need?

Procrastination on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.

As calvin views it

Leave me alone!

Ron Swanson has it right.

Donut Talk to me. Leaf Me Alone!

Bad things happens to you because you are stupid

everything happens for a reason but sometimes the reason is that you're stupid and make bad decisions

Limit of Stupidity

Incompetent people

How to abolish stupidity

On the bright side of stupidity

Without stupid people we would have no one to laugh at. Take time to thank a stupid person for their contribution.

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always certain of themselves and wiser people are so full of doubts

Quotes about stupid people

Stupidity should be painful

 You're not unlucky. Bad things happen to you because you're a dumbass

Insult by metaphor

If Assholes could fly this place would be an airport

Ways to insult your friends

on facebook

Rub it in...

I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew.

How to insult the general public

I'm exhausted at how stupid everyone is getting.

Insult like Shakepeare

Ladies and Gentleman, The insulter

Leave me Alone quotes

If I throw a stick, will you leave?

Smart And funny comebacks

Some rebuttals.. You know...just in case..

I've been called worse things by better people.- Pierre Trudeau

If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.


I would love to have a battle of wits with you, but you appear to be completely unarmed.

I don't even acknowledge you quotes

Ugarte: You despise me, don't you?

Rick Blaine: If I gave you any thought I probably would.

How to insult Incompetent workers

'The details of your incompetence do not interest me.'- The Devil Wears Prada

10 of the best Jeremy Clarkson's insults

That you can reuse at your disposal to insult your friends new car.

1. If I had to nitpick, and obviously I do...
2. It's capable of going fast in the same way that Queen Victoria was capable of running. It just doesn't seem to like it very much.
3. If you are clinically insane, by which I mean you wake up in the morning, and you think you are an onion, this is your car.
4. Sure it's quiet, for a diesel. But that's like being well-behaved... for a murderer...
5. Now what you get under the bonnet of this car is not an engine. You get a little field mouse named Gerald.
6. The air conditioning in a Lambo used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw..
7. I would buy that car if I was the sort of person who looked at their sister and thought, mmmmmm.
8. Telling people at a dinner party you drive a Nissan Almera is like telling them you’ve got the ebola virus and you’re about to sneeze.
9. “As something to live with every day, I’d rather have bird flu.”
10. I don’t understand bus lanes. Why do poor people have to get to places quicker than I do?

Funny sayings about a person's looks or appearances

He looks like a female llama who has been surprised in the bath. 

Insults about a person cowardice

A sheep in sheep’s clothing.